Okay, you posted all of your photos that your membership allows. You described yourself in “About Me”. You described the person you are “Seeking” and you completed all of the questions on your profile page. Now you get to present more of yourself as you begin to communicate with our other members.
LatinConexiones is happy to have you as a member of our community because you are a unique person. There is no other person on the planet that is exactly like you. What makes you that unique person is what lives inside you. You already shared some of who you are but now your communication with our other members will allow you to share more of your beliefs and values and your interests.
If done correctly online communication has proven to be more valuable to build good relationships than face-to-face communication or texting with a webcam. Why? Because you get to think about what it is you wish to communicate and how you wish to do so. And when you think about it you get to put a little more emotion in your messages and you get to share a little more intimacy. Not the deep-down intimacy. Save that for later. But the intimacy that you feel when you describe some of the things that you are passionate about.
For example, if you like to paint you get to describe how you enjoy bringing the colors together and creating what your heart sees and how you will like the finished piece to look. Or, if you are talking about your favorite movie you can share the affection for the storyline or one of the main characters. That intimacy and affection has a long-life in someone who reads your messages.
You have time to think and you have control over the message so you can put more emphasis into the message. You do not yet know their culture and reference criteria so take the time to fill in any voids in your message.
Honesty and Sincerity are foremost but here are some suggestions that have proven through studies to be very helpful in your communication.
Use proper communication grammar. Netspeak is a huge turnoff and is one of the primary reasons that messages will go unanswered. Messages that contain net speak will get practically no replies. Recipients are interested in intelligence and the fact that you care enough to take the time to write a proper message with good grammar. The exceptions seem to be ha ha and lol. Hello and hi by themselves also run the risk of being ignored. Hello followed by the name of the recipient is better but still not enough. There should be some other substance to the message.
The first message is normally the most difficult. Start with a comment or a question about something you saw in the photos or the profile. If your personal antennae are up there will be something that caught your attention and try to understand it and define it. The comment will show that you read the profile and the question should gain a response. It will also show that you have an interest in something that interests them.
If you perceive a similarity in the interests in their profile and your own interests go ahead and share that. History has shown that long-lasting relationships are built on both people having many similar interests. Many similar interests also allows room for individual interest not shared by both persons. For example, you may like boating but the other person likes kayaking which are both water sports. There is still a common interest.
Stay away from complimenting too heavily on the physical appearance. A little flattery is okay as everyone enjoys compliments on their looks. But too much may seem to imply more of a focus on physical appearance than on substance. On the other hand, a compliment on the elegance of the style of clothes is received much more favorably.
Be respectful. Treat others as you will like to be treated. There is a difference between being respectful and respecting someone for who they are. Being respectful shows that you are willing to grant your new interest a certain amount of respect as another human being. That is respect for what they are. The respect for who they are must be earned.
Ask lot of questions. If you are interested in someone then you will have lots of questions and you will need those answers. Don’t be hard-hitting. If the conversations continue there will be plenty of time for those kinds of questions. The upside is you get your answers and they will sense a greater level of interest.
Remember those answers. In the future you may wish to rephrase the questions and ask them again. A lot of time is required to truly know a person and the consistency that is shown in the answers will help you considerably.
Be yourself. Show who you are. Be careful. Don’t let the flow of the conversation sway you away from that unique person that you are.
And here is a great tip.
Trust your heart and head and soul.
Listen to all three and if the vibes are good you’ll make it through the conversations just fine. If any of those three create doubts then be extra careful or move on.